Some of you smoke and know you shouldn’t.
Some of you hit the drive thru and know you shouldn’t.
Some of you twiddle your thumbs and avoid tasks and know you shouldn’t.
Some of you do some other thing and know you shouldn’t.
Each of those things that you “shouldn’t” do, is actually fulfilling a need of yours. In that way, bad habits are actually good because they fulfill your needs.
On two separate occasions, working with two completely different clients, I heard these phrases almost verbatim: “I hate them,” “I feel awkward,” and “I have to.”
If you hate something and it makes you feel awkward, why would you “have to” do it?
When we are trying to learn a new skill or trying to learn how to do something better, we often turn towards “the experts” to guide us. Whether we are trying to lose weight, or trying to start a new business, or trying to learn how to be a parent, we turn to those who have done it before us, and look to them for the answers.
Then we take those answers and try to apply them to our lives, and our situations. We try to copy them and do exactly as they did, and hope for success.
Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t.
I consider myself to be a confident and articulate person, but I recently discovered that I have been undermining myself consistently without even realizing it. I have developed communication patterns that have caused me to lose job opportunities, lose clients, lose partnerships, or lose something else. All without even knowing.
I guarantee that the same thing is happening to you.
Here are 5 ways to communicate with confidence.